Critique of “Sunday Night in June”

            This is a story about a girl named Ruthie who has a friend, Lucy, whose father sexually abuses her.  They are both twelve years old and live in a small town, one that rains often, and this could symbolize the solemnity of the situation. The story comes full circle at the end when they run over Lucy’s dog, Edgar which she deems as an “innocent,” after letting him be free from the murder before it happens by setting Edgar free in the forest.  The story is told from the point of view of Ruthie, although the story really revolves around Lucy and the situation.  While Ruthie seems to be a good friend, Lucy really is the center of the story, though I think that the story being told through the point of view of Ruthie is a good point of view, because you get to see what happens through the perspective of the girls’ friendship, and the connection they have as children in a dilemma. 

            I think that the story is very well written with very vivid language, but the author skips around a lot.  There are moments that could be more fleshed out, such as the murder scene.  It’s hard for the reader to picture what is happening in this scene because Sarah only shows the actions of Lucy and Ruthie.  It says that the father dies, but the reader doesn’t get any description of a reflex or anything, it’s just known that he dies.  I also was wondering why Lucy was dancing in the car after she killed her father.  I felt like this was kind of a comedic relief. Towards the end of this story I was expecting this to be a dream because there was such a sense of surealness and ambiguity to it.  Something I would revise is the age of Lucy and Ruthie, because some of the things Ruthie says seem beyond her years, like on pages 2 and 3, where it says, “You could taste the magic in it on your tongue—it seeped into your skin like fairy dust and rode down the space between your back and your raincoat like a visitor from a far off world, stopping by for a quick hello.”  I think sometimes Sarah skips around without giving a vivid enough description of the scene and its action and dialogue, so she should pick a few scenes so that the story is more thorough.